SoCS: salted water

 

SoCS badge 2015

Linda has once again set a ponder-producing prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday: start and may be end the post with two letter words. One “small cheat,” I scattered a couple extra 2fers when checking for typos – the unwavy redlined sort I make where it’s a word, but not the one I intended. Though it can actually be a better word, so my subconscious is elbowing me again. For example, I initially typed: “. . . deep, scary place write now . . .” and though hummmmm, leave the unintentional and add the intentional.

 

As May is about mental illness/mental health, my SoCS reflects my efforts to incorporate my own state of mind at the moment. Don’t think I’ve been shy in saying that I have demons to battle. I’m in a very deep, scary place write/right now, so I lapse away from nice if/should-dos. If I don’t reciprocate by reading your posts or leaving comments, or respond for a while to one you leave; these are things I find hard to do. Am trying to write. Helped me survive before, maybe it will again. Some people could find what I’ve written disturbing. It’s not an admission of intent[ion].

 

Me, I live in a world of snot and tears

the irregular shaped salt rimmed stains

on my key board make it seem I spent

a day at sea, but this saline is human not ocean

 

I know the taste of both tears and sea

the sweetly-sour liquid on my lips

drowning in salted water

like I almost did in that tidal river

 

As I watched my flaying feet

heels sliding gainst tumbling rocked bottom

diamonded river water danced

smooth horizon heaven-miles up

 

I broke the surface when

last of air seeping from my skin

one foot caught hold and pushed

taste of blood, death, salt on my lips

 

So, I can still drown in salted water

ground rockily beneath my feet

tears like waves can wash over

saline may yet come to claim me*

 

found drowned (George Frederick Watts, 1867)*

*this SoC is not an intention to submerge myself in salt water; more that I could drown in my own river of salted tears

 

 

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “SoCS: salted water

the time has come, the walrus said, to talk of many things . . .

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s